She-Hulk post-credits finally solve an incredible Captain America mystery
She-Hulk: Attorney At Law is out here asking the real questions about the MCU, and we’re all the better for it.
Jennifer Walters salutes America’s Ass. In She-Hulk: Attorney At Law, streaming now on Disney+, messy millennial lawyer Jennifer Walters (Tatiana Maslany) transforms into a savage and sensational green superhero just like her cousin, Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo).
Though Jennifer is related by blood to a famous Avenger, Bruce hasn’t spilled every secret about Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. In the first episode of She-Hulk: Attorney At Law, a post-credits scene continues a joke planted early in the episode about Jennifer and her crush on Captain America.
Warning: Spoilers for She-Hulk: Attorney At Law Episode 1 ahead.
What happens in the She-Hulk Episode 1 post-credits?
First, some table setting: Early in the first episode of She-Hulk, Jennifer Walters (Maslany) rewinds back to “A Few Months Ago,” to a road trip with her cousin, Bruce Banner (Ruffalo).
Since we saw him in Avengers: Endgame Bruce healed his arm and reverted himself back to his human form through a new, one-of-a-kind device he invented. Hence how he’s able to be his normal self in a scenic drive with his cousin. (It should be said that the events of She-Hulk low-key conflict with the post-credits of Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, but we’re getting ahead. Wait until our coverage of Episode 2 before we talk about it more.)
During the ride, Jennifer brings up Steve Rogers. Specifically, she brings up the urban legend of Steve Rogers’ virginity. As Jennifer recaps a History Channel documentary for a totally amused Bruce, Steve supposedly never had sex. He was a virgin before he got the Super Soldier serum, and according to rumors, it’s believed that the chaos of war — not to mention, stopping HYDRA — prevented Steve from ever spending the night with someone.
Bruce keeps the truth to himself, mostly because their drive is interrupted by an alien warship. (More on that in Episode 2.) Fast forward to the post-credits, and Jennifer, pretending to be drunk, mopes about Steve’s virginity at Bruce’s beach bar. After all, he was a hero! A hero with a great ass. Why couldn’t Captain America get to enjoy the carnal pleasures of the flesh?
Bruce, now tired of Jennifer’s moping, reveals that Steve Rogers did in fact lose his virginity. According to Bruce, Steve lost his virginity while on a USO tour in 1943 (so, when he was a propaganda mascot selling war bonds as the “Star-Spangled Man With a Plan”) to an unnamed girl. One can presume it’s maybe one of the ladies dancing along with Steve on stage, but Bruce doesn’t really divulge those details.
Regardless, Jennifer is euphoric. Relieved that “America’s Ass” got some, Jennifer screams: “Captain America fuuuu—” (This is Disney+, of course she can’t say it.)
What the She-Hulk post-credits reveal about the MCU
At first glance, it’s easy to dismiss the post-credits as just a very funny tag (which it is, it’s legitimately very funny) and not something to take seriously. But for Captain America fans, it does allow a glimpse into Steve’s life that none of his own movies had time to explore.
It was telling when in Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Natasha (Scarlett Johansson) asks if the kiss they shared at the mall — to throw S.H.I.E.L.D. goons off their scent — was Steve’s first kiss since 1945. As Steve tells Natasha (almost defensively), “I’m 95. I’m not dead.”
For most of the MCU, Steve has only shown affection towards Peggy Carter (Hayley Atwell), with whom he didn’t truly reunite until the very end of Avengers: Endgame. Uncomfortably, Steve also had something with Peggy’s niece, Sharon (Emily VanCamp), but one could argue that their kiss in Captain America: Civil War was more of a belated thank you than any kind of romantic attraction.
A deleted scene from 2012’s The Avengers had Steve flirt with a New York waitress (played by Ashley Johnson, years before she rolled dice on Critical Role), though it was far more about a freshly-thawed Steve trying to find his way in the modern world than trying to hook up.
The romantic life of Steve Rogers has been a point of endless speculation and curiosity for fans, especially those who’d rather Steve hook up with Bucky Barnes. While the person who actually took Steve’s V-card remains shrouded in mystery, this being the MCU, maybe one day we’ll learn who was captivating enough to get Steve Rogers to knock his red boots.
She-Hulk: Attorney At Law streams new episodes Thursdays on Disney+.