In the lead-up to The Last Jedi’s premiere this December, fans have freaked out about two things: Porgs, and whether certain characters would turn to the dark side. That second type of fan theory has mostly been fueled by posters and promotional tie-in materials that appear to place characters like Luke and Poe on the “Dark Side” of the poster. It’s a whole thing. With that in mind, let’s look at a new Last Jedi promotion, which brings it all together by making a strong case that Porgs are actually the perfect nexus of the Force.

Hear me out.

Alamo Drafthouse Cinema is giving away exclusive pint glasses with early purchases of Last Jedi tickets, and there are three different designs. One, the “Light Side Glass,” sports a stylish illustration of Rey, Leia, Finn, Chewbacca, BB-8, and a couple other characters. The “Dark Side Glass” features Kylo Ren, with an image of Luke looming in the background. More evidence that Luke’s going to break bad in the upcoming movie? Maybe, but I’m more interested in the third glass — and it’s placement on Alamo’s page advertising the glasses.

So, if the Force is a spectrum, these promotional cups indicate that it goes “Light Side > Porg > Dark Side.” That whole prophecy about Anakin bringing balance to the Force? Totally unnecessary, because Porgs already exist.

Ahch-To, the planet Porgs call home, is where the First Jedi Temple is. Perhaps the Jedi were drawn to the planet in the first place because they sensed that Porgs had perfected the Force. Maybe Luke (and Rey) will train in the Grey Side of the Force, learning from wise, sublimely balanced Porgs. And then they’ll eat some.

Is this theory crazy? Heck yeah — crazy enough to work.


Star Wars: The Last Jedi comes out on December 15, and then we will be free.

If you liked this article, check out this video of an insane theory that connects Snoke to Anakin Skywalker.