There’s nothing more thrilling than seeing a brilliant new monster brought to life. Remember how everyone lost it over the Pan’s Labyrinth freaky Pale Man? There are plenty of great cinematic monsters, but we scrounged up some of the weirdest ones from folklore, comics, and literature that we desperately want to see on our screens.
Lilith’s Brood is one of the best sci-fi series out there, and we may finally be ready to properly tackle it’s themes of race, sexuality, and gender. The Oankali is the alien race that eventually hybridizes with humans. They have a third gender —oolie — and they are faceless and hideous be weirdly kinda sexy? We’d trust director Jennifer Phang with this one.
Okay, so Medusa has appeared onscreen before, but never have we seen her character fully explored. She is one of the figures from Greek myth that has inspired the most reinterpretation. She’s been adopted as a feminist symbol and one popular reading is that her power is given not as a punishment but as a gift to protect her from men. So give us a modern-day Medusa, defender of women, played by Gina Torres with sunglasses and a headscarf she never takes off. Give us a campy buddy road trip film with Medusa and Athena (Lucy Lawless) on the road to vengeance, or a gritty thriller where Medusa is a domestic violence counselor with nerves of steel and a dark secret.
Etrigan the Demon
DC’s rhyming demon antihero deserves, at very least, an appearance in one of the Justice League movies, but he could carry a time-hopping historical romp as well. He’s got pretty super powers, even as demons go, can do magic, heal himself, and spout hellfire. He and his immortal human host, Jason Blood hail from the age of Camelot, so you could go full scary demon or keep it comically anachronistic with Etrigan. Perhaps the role could go to Daniel Portman, if he wants to keep up with the sword-fighting badassery and Shakespeare all in one.
The weretiger is a lesser known cousin of the werewolf found in several Southeast Asian mythologies. There are a couple variations on its origin, but it’s basically exactly what it sounds like, ie, fucking awesome. We’d love to see a weretiger on screen in a weird-ass, technicolor fantasy-fest like Ching Siu-tung’s The Sorcerer and the White Snake.
These creepy shapeshifters from Navajo folklore have appeared on screen before (recently on Wynonna Earp) but their history and cultural relevance haven’t been respectfully explored yet. Cleverman is proving that ancient mythologies can make for excellent sci-fi when handled properly. Skinwalkers are just one figure we’d love to see in their true form.
This obscure Marvel villain needs to make its way into the Marvel film-verse, stat. His origin is kind of convoluted and not that important because the dude is a Nazi who is literally made of bees. Do we need to explain why that’s awesome?
We’ve said before that Latin American literature has so many seeds of great horror. One that stands out is Chac Mool, a short story by Carlos Fuentes. The Chac Mool is a Mayan diety that wrecks havoc when it comes to life inside an average dude’s basement.
Woland’s gang from The Master and Margarita
There’s never been an English language film version of Bulgakov’s sprawling satirical novel and it would be admittedly difficult to do a faithful adaptation that does the book justice. But Professor Woland and his dynamic gang are begging to get a proper screen treatment. In particular, Behemoth, the vodka shooting, wise-cracking demon cat, is one of literature’s best monsters. Since Woland is actually Satan incarnate, we could have the gang time travel to a political moment that is a little more accessible to a current Western audience, perhaps even a dystopic near-future. Think Mads Mikkelson as Woland, Stef Dawson as Hella the succubus, Ari Millen as Fagotto, Iwan Rheon as Azazello, and Tim Curry voicing the infamous Behemoth.
Prince Robot IV
It might be a stretch to call Prince Robot IV a monster—more of a cyborg really, or a very advanced being of artificial intelligence. Of course he’s got some nuance to his character, but he also has a TV for a head and a cannon arm. He’s part of a gorgeous, sexy, and imaginative story full of brilliant characters. Although creators Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples are publicly against a cinematic adaptation of Saga, it’s fun to imagine Prince Robot’s visual effects, in particular.
Larry from ‘Mrs. Caliban’
Who says a monster has to be scary? We deserve a great film adaptation of Rachel Ingalls’ funny, poignant, and seductive novel Mrs. Caliban, which tells the story of a lonely housewife who falls for an alien sea creature named Larry. Talk about a meet cute: “One leg was slung over the other, which would have looked strange enough, but he was also wearing a flowered apron fastened around his waist, and it contrasted stunningly with his large, muscular green body, his nobly massive head.” We’ll go out on a limb and suggest someone striking like Djimon Hounsou opposite, say, Laura Linney.