The latest “plot leak” for Star Wars: Episode VIII is claiming Supreme Leader Snoke will be somehow revealed as Luke Skywalker’s pseudo-grandfather.

As much as we love speculating about everything having do with Star Wars this rumor seems to be one fans can probably shoot down easier than bulls-eyeing a womp-rat. According to the rumor, Snoke’s dark side powers somehow influenced the midichlorians to conceive Anakin Skywalker, much in the way Palpatine describes similar life-manipulating abilities in Revenge of the Sith. But, we’re calling bullshit on this for the simple reason that the conception of Anakin Skywalker will (and should) always remain a mystery.

In The Phantom Menace Shmi Skywalker tells Qui-Gon “there was no father,” which while a little weird, doesn’t totally shock the venerable Jedi. Qui-Gon later tells the Jedi council that he thinks Anakin was “conceived by midichlorians.” As much as fans might still hate the prequel movies — and The Phantom Menace in partiuclar — this still counts. Anakin Skywalker is the ultimate outer-space bastard and it seems really unlikely that Rian Johnson or Lawerence Kasdan will go back and mess with any specific details about this partiuclar sci-fi virgin birth.

Plus, we all know how Johnson feels about all the Snoke theories, and if we were to put this one in race with some of the other ones, the idea of Rey being related to Snoke, or Snoke secretly being Jar Jar both seem way likelier.

Photos via steven mcgarrett, Disney/Lucasfilm