Twitter reacts to Apple’s impending “Hey Siri” day in the way Twitter has perfected: dad jokes. That is, in the style of dads, rather than jokes about dads. Because who would laugh at a joke about your dad? That’s a your mom joke, silly.

There’s a sad dad:

Fatherly consumer advice:

Planned obsolescence quips:

Dads that go to New Jersey:

DILF fan fiction:

The NYT Food Dad-troll. Hahaha “more coffeecake than dessert” hahahaha:

But the best Apple Dad account by far is @Apple, which has earned its 34.6K followers simply by adhering to the number one rule of Twitter and never tweeting.

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