Saturday Night Live had a lot of potential material for this week’s show, what with the government shutdown, the Women’s March, and news of President Trump’s affair with porn star Stormy Daniels as just a few of the week’s breaking news.
But it started out by parodying the press conference held by Dr. Ronny Jackson, the official White House physician, on Tuesday, which claimed that the president was in “excellent” health.
In the SNL parody of events, Aidy Bryant’s White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders acknowledges the Women’s March on Saturday “to celebrate the President’s first kick-ass year in office. We did it girls!”, blaming the government shutdown on Democratic Senator Chuck Schumer, before inviting Beck Bennet’s Ronny Jackson to “come out here and tell you how not fat the president is.”
In addition to confirming the president’s height and weight — 6’3 and 239 pounds, just one pound short of clinically obese — in glowing terms (“71 years and 7 months young,” weight “a very svelte 239 pounds,” with “legs that seem to go on forever.”), Jackson confirmed the president’s mental aptitude.
“We did do a cognitive exam at the president’s request and he passed it with flying colors, almost no hints,” adding, “In fairness, no other president has been given this exam, we typically only use to make sure someone’s not severely brain-damaged or a monkey in people’s clothes.”
SNL’s reporters were dubious.
“Some people are saying these results are fabricated because they’ve taken even one look at the president,” Cecily Strong’s White House correspondent prefaced one of her questions.
Meanwhile, a reporter portrayed by Kate McKinnon asked simply, “How broke that brain?”
Jackson also addressed the news of Donald Trump’s alleged affair with porn star Stormy Daniels by sharing that Trump had also gone through a sexual exam, and that while Jackson could not confirm sexual relations, “if they did, she’s a lucky woman.”
To permanently lay to rest these rumors and doubts, the press secretary responded that “the president has passed every exam that we gave him, physical exam, mental exam, and the Tide Pod Challenge — crushed it!”
Given the mania over the latest Internet craze among teens, it was the perfect detail to end the skit, and start the show.