It’s national margarita today! Sure, you could hit up your local dive bar and roll the dice on whatever concoction they’ve got churning around in that slushy machine that doesn’t look like it’s been washed since 2007, or you could go ahead and make your own. It’s not hard, even if you’re like me and any recipe with more than three ingredients sounds like a herculean task.

Blenders are good for a lot of other stuff, too. You could make frozen G&Ts, or a Pina Colada, for instance. Some people use them for vegetables and healthy smoothies, I hear, but I wouldn’t know anything about that. You can go ahead and put salt on the rim of your margarita glass if you want! That’s healthy, right? Bodies need sodium, after all.


5. The Nutribullet

Nutribullet promises to “effortlessly pulverize” fruits, vegetables, and “superfoods”, which is for sure something a video game villain would say. There’s also a second, gentler blade if you’re not looking to fully destroy whatever you pop in here. [Amazon, $69.99]

oster blender

4. Oster VERSA Pro Performance Blender

A truly intimidating blender that looks more like an antagonist robot than something to help you whirr up some frosty top-shelf margs. It does that, though, and will definitely not overthrow you when the singularity comes to pass. [Amazon, $149.95]

ninja blender

3. Ninja 1000 Watts Blender

Ninja makes some very nice, very reliable blending equipment. This thing is just as at home demolishing a bunch of carrots for a nutritional juice as it is ice and tequila for something much less nutritious but no less important. [Amazon, $59.99]

hamilton beach blender

2. Hamilton Beach 12-Speed Blender

With 12 blending options, this offering from Hamilton Beach can crush, blend, juice, and everything in between. [Amazon, $26.85]

amazonbasics blender

1. AmazonBasics Blender

Look, by the time any of these blenders arrive, Margarita day will have passed. That’s just the reality of the inexorable march of time. Still, don’t let anyone tell you when or when not to have a tall marg. National Margarita Day is a state of mind, which I think is the gist of approximately 70 percent of Jimmy Buffet songs. AmazonBasics have you covered for a no-frills, decent blender which will get just about any medium-duty job done, and done well. Go forth and enjoy. [Amazon, $24.99]

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