Finally, some good news. In a hilarious caper, two men robbed sex toy manufacturer LELO this week, apparently looking for exactly 33 vibrating butt plugs. Because the robbery was so ridiculous, the company posted its security camera footage online as an ad for its sex toys. LELO products are apparently so good, people are willing to ram their cars into the back of a warehouse and really get deep in there, just to get those butt plugs early.
Somehow, reading about the butt plugs the men stole only makes the heist more hilarious. The HUGO prostate massager is remote controlled, and LELO says it products the “most powerful orgasm known to man,” which is a pun. It’s not clear why these men stole 33 HUGOs when the company’s solid gold butt plugs were assumedly also in the warehouse. The EARL, a solid 24-karat gold butt plug, is supposedly for the “distinguished gentleman,” but apparently the butt plug bandits fancy themselves commoners as far as anal play is concerned.
You can watch the full caper below.
The men also stole 30,000 condoms and 48 sets of Kegel beads from the Las Vegas warehouse, literally tossing boxes into the open trunk of their rental car before pealing out into the parking lot. LELO, rather than flip out about lost merchandise, published the entire security video on YouTube for people to watch. Pavle Sedic, the company’s U.S. president, says in a statement that, at this rate, he’s just hoping the thieves use the condoms for safe sex.
For those who may know the butt plug bandits’ identities, the contact point for the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department is PIO@lvmpd.com. The bandits are still at large, assumedly enjoying powerful orgasms somewhere on the Vegas strip.