'Shrek' Deserves to Win the Oscar for Best Animated Feature Every Year

The first winner of the award has always been the best.


Is there anything more iconic than watching ogres make out to Rufus Wainwright’s rendition of “Hallelujah”? Not if you’re on the right history as every man, woman, and child who’s seen Shrek can tell you. But Shrek is iconic for more than just the fact that it reclaimed unreasonable beauty standards for orges in Hollywood. The cinematic classic also has the prestigious honor of winning the first ever Best Animated Feature Oscar in 2002.

In honor of the biggest achievement to be recognized by the Oscars of all time, here’s a list of the reasons why Shrek should be receiving this award every year.

1. Shrek launched a million mixed CDs with “Hallelujah” on it.

If someone tried to woo you in middle school with this track, that’s how you knew it was real. Somehow Shrek managed to evoke a thirst for true love in America’s horniest demographic — a feat that should be rewarded till the end of time.

2. Though Fionna and Shrek end up together in the movie, Shrek and Donkey - the movie’s TRUE power couple - were there to accept the Oscar.

The 2002 Oscars did this great gag where the animated category green-screened in it’s stars. When Shrek rightfully won, the nation got confirmation of the biggest rumor in Hollywood. With a single kiss that Donkey placed on Shrek’s cheek, an entire fandom was born. Does the future look like a beautiful cornucopia of (fictional) interspecies children with white picket fences in swamps to boot? It might be too soon to tell, but if it happens, know that Shrek paved the way.

3. Shrek proved that Mike Meyers should be seen and not heard.

The greatest performance of Mike Meyer’s career was undoubtedly Shrek. And he knows it too. If you truly want to understand the impact of Shrek take a stroll down Mike Meyers imdb page. Every single movie post Shrek is a massive flop. Do you even remember The Love Guru? Well? That’s what I fucking thought - and Justin Timberlake was in that movie! If a former boybander can’t get something to pop off, you know something went horrible wrong. And that horribly wrong thing is Mike Meyer’s face. Despite being quite a nice face, it simply can’t compete with the rich dulcet tones that Meyers lends to the world’s most iconic leading orge. Thank goodness he wised up and made three more Shrek features and fuckton of spin offs instead of more live action work.

4. Shrek spawned so many more Shreks.

If we’re arguing about legacy, no Oscar nom can hold a candle to Shrek. Shrek spawned more spin off than Toy Story — that hack movie the people pretend is the greatest animated movie of all time. You know what happens at the end of Toy Story sequels? The toys get LEFT BEHIND. You know what happens at the of the Shrek sequels? Shrek gets trapped in an alternate timeline where he falls in love with Fiona all over again BECAUSE LOVE IS REAL. I’ll let you decide which lesson is better for the children.

5. Name me a more iconic ogre. I’ll wait.


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