Because Kylo Ren has a super-selective view of galactic history, it makes sense he would still be pissed about the destruction of the first Death Star. And in a new video, our favorite moody Dark side user of the Force views the final Rogue One: A Star Wars Story trailer and goes completely apeshit.
“How did the Empire blow this!?” Kylo rages while watching Rebels sabotage the Empire, “They had it all!”
The video popped up on October 14 and is actually the latest in a series of spoofs put out by the comedy group called “Auralnauts.” We can’t prove this isn’t Adam Driver doing Kylo’s voice for these videos, because whoever it is sounds exactly like him and the dialogue is flawlessly authentic. It’s in Kylo’s frustration with the Empire’s incompetence where we believe this is really the same character. According to Kylo, “a team of welders” could have fixed the exposed exhaust port which eventually lead to the Death Star’s demise. To be clear, he’s not just critical of the Rebels. Kylo is pissed at the Empire, too!
“Why are running around on tropical planets chasing “magic stick man” when you should be in a board room, clawing over the blueprints of the Death Star LOOKING for critical design flaws such as an open, unprotected shaft-thing!”
The “magic stick man” Kylo refers to dismissively is of course, the spiritual Chirrut Îmwe. Kylo seems weirdly jealous of Chirrut, mentioning he even went out and got his “own stick” after viewing the previous trailer.
Watch Kylo’s full Rogue One meltdown right here.