Culture

8 Nerdy Water Bottles That'll Keep You Hydrated

You need water. Don't you want a bottle that expresses your obsession? Here it is.

Unsplash / Evan Wise

What does you water bottle say on it? The brand name of whatever company made it? You already bought the bottle they made, marketed, and shipped to you. Don’t also do their advertising!

Here are water bottles that express the brands you like, you nerd you!

Whether you are a Star Trek nerd or into something more obscure, carry a bottle you love. Don’t you think that’s the bare minimum for something you are going to have with you always and be constantly sticking in your mouth?

We found eight awesome solutions to this modern dilemma.

OLD GAMER

OLD GAMER

Threadless

You need a water bottle. Nothing fancy. But you always want to get laughs from your mates, right? And your mates—like you—are nerds. Don’t overplay this one. Just hand it to someone parched. Classic! They get water. You get props. Because in the world of gaming, you are old and should be using a walker!

Nalgene Marvel 32oz Wide Mouth BPA-Free Water Bottle

Nalgene Marvel 32oz Wide Mouth BPA-Free Water Bottle

Amazon

Why settle for a standard Nalgene water bottle when you can have spidey eyes?

Nalgene is the classic, BPA-Free bottle. It’s a favorite of climbers, hikers, and sporty types everywhere. It holds a lot of water. It won’t poison you. It’s indestructible. And it’s light. Spidey is all those things, too!

No one will steal your water bottle! Because no one else will have Red Spidey Eyes!

That’s What I Do I Drink and I Know Things LEADO 30 oz Tumbler Dad Travel Mug

That's What I Do I Drink and I Know Things - LEADO 30 oz Tumbler Dad Travel Mug

Amazon

If you are going to drink—and know things—do it from a double-wall insulated stainless steel wide-mouth mug. You are less likely to spill your beverage. The ice won’t melt. If it’s hot, it will stay that way. And no one will question the contents so you can drink what you like.

Knowing these things makes drinking less of a hassle. Tyrion would approve.

Math Equations // Black Travel Mug

Math Equations Mug

Society6

“Fact one: you’re a math whiz, apparently. Fact number two: you’re a political junkie. Fact number three: you love My Little Pony.

If you’re a nerd, you see what I did there.

Maybe you aren’t into My Little Pony (anymore!) But you get that it contains all the standard nerd tropes, right? And you are nerd enough to laugh too hard when recalling that amazing speech (Dustin to Erica on discovering she is a nerd) from Stranger Things.

If all that made complete sense to you, then logic suggests you are a nerd and that you also like math. And if you like math, this the travel mug for you. It’s slathered in math!

Star Wars Stainless Steel Water Bottle - Fun Retro Endor Design - Vacuum Insulated - 18 oz

Star Wars Stainless Steel Water Bottle - Fun Retro Endor Design - Vacuum Insulated - 18 oz

Amazon

Harken back to the good times you had on Endor with this lovely travel mug in your hand to remind you. The retro design features an old-style canteen lid and images of a death star, trees, and Imperial Walkers.

This is not just nerdy it is also a nice stainless, double-walled thermos you can use every day to keep beverages hot or cold.

Firefly Ship Works Ltd. Sticker Sticker

Firefly Ship Works Ltd. Sticker Sticker

Redbubble

Maybe you are already in a committed relationship with a water bottle. That makes sense. You have a Yeti or something nice you use daily. But you like this nerd-expression idea. Because…it’s a great idea!

Here’s what you do: Stickers!

And this one is as nerdy as nerdy gets. It’s the ID tag for a Firefly class ship helmed by Joss Whedon. Subtle, obscure, and awesome. It’s everything you are looking for.

Mudders Milk Sticker

Redbuble.com

This one, though! That’s a beverage in your hand, right? Label it as Mudders Milk and wish for a crappy planet where you are the hero!

Whatever you are drinking in that bottle of yours will be a lot more fun if you imagine that you could be living off Mudders Milk, laboring in the mud, and singing songs of worship to a folk-hero named Jayne.

Every time you sit down for a meal, announe “The living legend needs eggs!” That will secure your place in Nerd Hall.

Firefly/Mass Effect Blue Sun Logo (blue) Water Bottle

Firefly/Mass Effect Blue Sun Logo (blue) Water Bottle

Redbubble

Blue Sun is the evil corporation that owns everything in Firefly. Why would you not have a water bottle emblazoned with its logo. That logo is on everything. You can’t escape it. It’s why you keep going deeper and deeper into the black.

Firefly fans will get you. No one else will notice. And that’s the way you like it.