Michigan Octogenarian Avoids Prostitution Charges Because He Was a Good Guy

He's old and hasn't been in trouble before, so what the hell.

Paul Townsend/Flickr

An 87-year-old Michigan man has beaten charges that he solicited a prostitute, reports. On what grounds, exactly? Well, Kent County Prosecutor William Forsyth said he was a good guy, so ¯\(ツ)/¯. Here’s your money quote:

What would be the purpose in prosecuting him? He wouldn’t and shouldn’t go to jail and 87 years without involvement in the criminal justice system has, in my opinion, earned him a pass.

The man in question, Howard Arthur Klein, serves as the example of “the life well lived.” Being an upstanding citizen often sounds pretty boring. Occasionally, you just want to get in a little trouble. (Maybe you find red lights a little pesky and want to make a change.) But Klein’s case shows that you could be better off toeing the line. He basically got a mulligan on one misstep because he built up enough good karma over the years to justify a fuck-up.

Klein is friendly and understanding in an interview with a local TV station following his original arrest. It doesn’t really matter whether he tried soliciting a prostitute or not. He’s lived a long life and seemingly done plenty of good! (He used to work on an orchard.) Be kind to others. Don’t break the rules too badly. It’ll pay off one day. Especially if you don’t get caught.

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