Jonathan Goldstein’s WireTap signed off for the final time after an 11-year run Wednesday, but not before leaving listeners with some useful advice, delivered from older people to their younger selves.
“Dear 6-year-old,” begins the first girl, perspective wizened by potty training and two years of formal education and the sorrow of a hundred time outs drowned with a thousand emptied juice boxes. “Training wheels are for babies. Just let go already. Regards, a 7-year-old.”
Bibles’ worth of truth, child.
The 7-year-old is in turn advised by an 8-year-old, the 8-year-old by the 9-year-old, and so on with sands pouring through the hourglass until we’re left with a 93-year-old whose final revelation is a twist that confirms and subverts all that came before: Nobody knows anything. Life is confusing, and long, and short, and great, and you should spend it doing whatever you damn well please because nobody worth knowing is judging you on it anyway. Also, stay weird. Weird enough to think of a brilliant video like this.
And that nugget about asking her to dance? That’s legit, all ages.