Cormac McCarthy's Twitter Was Rich Even Before He Joined

Cormac McCarthy, writer of bleak modern westerns like The Road, No Country For Old Men, All The Pretty Horses, and Blood Meridian appears to have joined Twitter, as unlikely as that seems.

Even if you haven’t read McCarthy’s stuff, you’ve surely run across his imitators. His prose has a sort of Hemingway-by-way-of-Stephen-King texture to it, which can either be an inspiration or spoofworthy, however you care to take it. Here’s the real stuff, from The Road:

He walked out in the gray light and stood and he saw for a brief moment the absolute truth of the world. The cold relentless circling of the intestate earth. Darkness implacable. The blind dogs of the sun in their running. The crushing black vacuum of the universe. And somewhere two hunted animals trembling like ground-foxes in their cover. Borrowed time and borrowed world and borrowed eyes with which to sorrow it.

Mr. McCarthy might be surprised to find that people have excelled at being him on Twitter for a long time. If he is uncertain about how this will go, he should look to his imitators.

Here’s one such faker:

Here’s one who is kindly planning your career for you:

Here’s another Cormac McCarthy who appears to be a folk musician, if you’re looking for a career change, Mr. McCarthy:

Here’s a Cormac who uses his customary phrasing to comment on the sad state of modern music:

And last but certainly not least, here is another imitator who uses McCarthian phrasing but accompanies it with the hashtag you never knew you wanted to see Cormac McCarthy use:

Welcome to the bloody wasteland of Twitter, Mr. McCarthy.