Science

Florida Man Steals Confederate Flag, Is Caught Via YouTube

Right idea, wrong way to celebrate.

A Florida man recently took down and stole a Confederate flag from a Bradenton residence, The Smoking Gun reports. The man, Dejerrian Dequan Murray, acted nobly in absconding with a 57-year-old Tropicana employee’s (Robin Eaker) flag. Unfortunately, no good deed goes unpunished because Murray was caught on film…by his getaway driver.

There’s no doubt that Murray was in the right. If the Stars and Bars weren’t a solid enough indication, Eaker proved himself to an unabashed piece of shit, claiming he was unable to identify Murray among friends in Facebook photos because “they all look the same to [him].” (Murray was ultimately identified by an anonymous caller.)

The issue at hand is that Murray’s unidentified accomplice filmed the theft (and apparently edited it, adding in a Super Mario-like “success!” noise at the 11-second mark), while another friend, Jamari Williams, posted it to Facebook, seemingly to Murray’s knowledge. Petty crimes can be fun! But showing the video to some friends is satisfying enough. With just a few thousand views, Murray’s actions aren’t likely to incite a surge in vigilante flag-stealing justice. Had he not gotten caught, Murray could’ve snagged many more flags to burn, shred into confetti, or use to line a litter box — whatever he may have pleased. No matter how proud or right you are, just keep the crimes offline. It’s best for all of us.