Last fall, Pharrell came out with an Adidas line of “remixed” Stan Smiths. Now, for those unaware of the Stan Smith line, it’s one of the most iconic — and iconically simple — tennis shoe lines in history. Like its cousin, the mesh Rod Laver, t spans age and interest; they’re about as timeless as timeless gets for a leather sneaker.

Here’s what Pharrell did to them:

What I see Pharrell doing here is “Bape-ifying” the Stan Smith. In the early 2000s, Pharrell struck a partnership with the Japanese designer Nygo, whose Bape sneakers now represent the early era of hyper-exclusive sneaker culture. Even though a lot of the designs were wild and ugly, they were small-batch; instant collectors items whose value skyrocketed on the secondary market. Pharrell has taken a product that should have never been touched in the first place and Bape-ified them.

Uncontent with his destruction, Pharrell has launched a second line that fucks up a classic sneaker: the shell-toed Adidas. This is no way to spit on Fred Durst’s grave! At least with this product, he’s teamed up with architect Zaha Hadid; it’s easier to split the blame two ways.

But why pay less for a classic black or white shelltoe when you could pay more for a pair that have “SPACE” and “MATTER” molded into the plastic? Too bad I’m broke from buying his Uni Qlo line.