Researcher Finds That Vampires Are Actually Very Nice

Doctors want to learn about 'real vampires,' but nobody's volunteering.


Being a vampire is tough. There are the painful sunburns, sure, but having to find blood all the time is the real hassle. At least what the thousands of people in the so-called “real vampire” community say. Now, one Idaho researcher is trying to help this misunderstood, blood-starved minority.

According to Reuters, Idaho State University researcher D.J. Williams spent a decade insinuating himself into the vampire community, earning the trust of people whom doctors frequently diagnose as mentally ill. Williams is now publishing his findings in Critical Social Work with the hope of shedding some light on the tight knit community.

Notably, Williams found people that identified as vampires acted ethically. They only ingested blood from consenting partners, and even practiced their incisions to ensure that any feeding sessions were done safely.

“The real vampire community seems to be a conscientious and ethical one,” Williams told reporters.

While Williams says that the 11 people who talked to him for this recent paper all believed they were born with their condition, he stops short of providing a medical or psychological diagnosis. And while the community is relatively small, it seems worth at least a few unbiased studies if medical professionals want to help.

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