Civvl is a gig-based company that hires you to help evict people

We're still unclear whether or not you sell your soul after agreeing to the company's Terms & Conditions.

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Our abject debasement and financial depravity in service of the Late Capitalist gods continues with arguably the most tasteless "disruption" gig-company in recent history: Meet Civvl, the company trying to hire temp movers to help evict people coming up short on rent due to COVID-19.

Uber, but for eviction crews — As detailed today in a piece from Vice, the godawful premise unfortunately isn't some bitingly clever satirical project, but a real company that's been posting Craigslist job ads nationally. It promises fast, easy cash ($125/hour, per that Nashville listing) for "Clean out crews, Eviction Crews, Independant [sic] Contractors, [and] Process Servers."

"Unemployment is at a record high and many cannot or simply are not paying rent and mortgages... There is plenty of work due to the dismal economy," reads the job call. We'll give you a moment to recover from that sinking feeling you just felt in your chest.

We're trying to think of a better way to say, "Fuck this shit," but it's escaping us.Craigslist / Civvl

Civvl's website promises all your standard gig-speak perks including "flexible hours" and being your own boss, which even if true (it's not), still doesn't wash all the blood from your hands that comes from evicting financially struggling families from their residences because they can't keep up during a governmentally-botched pandemic response. Seemingly out of a shared sense of disbelief, Vice looked into Civvl's parent company, OnQall, to make sure it actually exists. Unfortunately, it does, as evidenced by a number of similar, relatively unheard of gig-economy apps including LawnFixr, CleanQwik, and MoveQwik. Very qute.

Endorsements as shady as its business — Perhaps unsurprisingly, OnQall's endorsements are equally shady and weird. There are apparently videos of both Ice-T (awesome) and Omarosa (not awesome) shilling for the company — "It's basically Uber, for side hustle jobs. You dig it?" says Ice-T in a brief clip — but only a quick examination reveals these endorsements are, in actuality ...well, Cameos. Even Omarosa's reps distanced her from the app. "Mrs Newman is NOT associated with Civvl. That video is certainly a cameo [sic] and should be credited as such," her spokeperson told Vice.

Basically, the whole thing makes you want to take a cold shower... cold, because we don't have the money to pay for basic utilities like heat right now. What a lovely dystopia this is all shaping up to be...