Velveeta, the century-old brand that’s now owned by Kraft, has released a gimmicky martini called "The Veltini,” available as in-home delivery kits or from the restaurant BLT Steak. Velveeta, legally known by the lawsuit-proof mouthful “pasteurized prepared cheese product,” is now an alcoholic beverage. The Veltini entails Velveeta cheese-infused vodka stirred with olive brine and dry vermouth. The drink is garnished with Velveeta cheese shells, Velveeta-stuffed olives, and dubious “cheese drip.”
I’ve never personally eaten Velveeta at the club, but the Veltini isn’t the first time that the Velveeta brand has recommended enjoying its processed dairy bricks on the town. A 1937 newspaper ad recommends eating it on nights out “between dances.”
Where do I get it? — The drink will be on the menu for a limited time only and while supplies last at BLT restaurant locations in New York, Washington, D.C., and Charlotte, North Carolina. Prepare yourself to spend an entire fifteen dollars on an alcoholic drink infused with pasteurized prepared cheese product. If you can’t make it to the restaurant, there’s also a $50 kit available by mail which doesn’t include alcohol but does contain two martini glasses and a gold cocktail shaker.
"As we look to summer, one of life’s greatest pleasures is enjoying summer sips during golden hour," Velveeta Senior Brand Communications Manager Kelsey Rice said in a news release. "We wanted to find a way to elevate this experience for our fans even further, by bringing the rich, creamy goodness of Velveeta to a martini in a unique and unexpected way for the ultimate outrageous pleasure."
Say cheese! — The deranged, limited-release cheese products have been in full force lately. We’ve survived the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos Mountain Dew, the Kraft Macaroni and Cheese ice cream from Van Leeuwen. Last month, Velveeta released a cheese-scented nail polish. Weird promotional beverages have made the rounds, too: the Sonic chili dog energy drink and vodka releases by both Arby’s and Lay’s.
Fittingly, Velveeta’s campaign tagline is “la dolce Velveeta,” which “is all about stepping out in a confident, unapologetic way to show the world that you’re living a life filled with outrageous pleasure.”