Entertainment

John Oliver: Scandal-Ridden Trump Is 'America's Wealthiest Hemorrhoid'

Clinton has a questionable record, but it's nothing compared to Trump.

Last Week Tonight/YouTube

John Oliver is back, and this time, he’s turned his aim toward the 2016 presidential election, an unprecedented showdown between two candidates with astonishingly high levels of distrust. On the eve of the first showdown between Trump and Clinton, as polls show the race tightening to incredibly close levels, Oliver has a simple message: If you’re going to judge candidates on the number of scandals, Trump loses by a landslide.

“Ethical failings in politicians are like raisins in a cookie,” Oliver said. “They shouldn’t be there. They disgust people.” But there is an important distinction between the amount of raisins contained in both Trump and Clinton, with the latter reaching unfathomable levels. “The man is a fucking raisin monsoon!”

Trump, which Oliver describes as “an unambiguously racist scarecrow stuffed with scrunched-up copies of Juggs magazine,” has a number of scandals to his name. “Not being as bad as Donald Trump is a low bar to clear,” said Oliver.

As an example, Trump is the first major party nominee since 1980 not to release his tax returns. This is something he blamed on an ongoing audit, but the IRS publicly rebutted this excuse, and there are questions about whether Trump really is being audited. Similarly, questions arose over his charitable trust after it was reported that he spent foundation money to settle lawsuits in his businesses. Trump also seemed confused over whether a blind trust overseen by his relatives was truly independent.

Of course, this election has encouraged new levels of voter apathy, and many are voicing their interest in third party candidates in the wake of what they feel is an unsatisfactory choice of presidents. Oliver described the race as “the electoral equivalent of seeing someone puking, so you start puking, and then someone else is puking and pretty soon everyone is puking 2016.”

“This campaign has been dominated by scandals, but it is dangerous to think that there is an equal number,” Oliver said. “You can be irritated by some of Hillary’s, that is understandable, but you should then be fucking outraged by Trump’s.”